CrankyP, you thought you had a problem.

And you thought it was obnoxious to get people thinking your travels are just an opportunity to meet someone "special."

Ha.

The weirdest thing in my whole damn life has been having women I've known for years. sane, reasonable women, try to set up my kid with some doofus of a teen-aged boy (nephew, son, son of a friend).
I utterly don't get it.

The first time it was just weird.
For years my friend from grad school and I used to go to movies together every couple of weeks, and either Tom or Sarah would come with us, if the times worked out.
Then suddenly she wants her nephew to come along.
Fair enough.

But not too great either, since the kid is kind of high maintenance.
Doesn't really want to watch anything that isn't going crashboom, and he can't discuss what he's just seen.
He's just like a big lump, waiting for the grown-ups to placate him.
So it's suddenly like we're babysitting.
(And no, taking Sarah to a movie is not babysitting.)

Then the second time her nephew comes along, I realize she's thinking he should pay for Sarah's ticket, and it'd be, like, a date….
Well, Sarah's a polite kid, so maybe it wasn't obvious, but she really doesn't like the nephew.
When they were kids he used to make fun of her voice.
And he's rough.
(Friend has a parrot.
Parrot hates nephew and uncles because they enjoy rough teasing.
Sarah agrees with parrot.)
Upshot is that the movie thing isn't happening any more.
Maybe after next year, when Sarah goes off to college, I'll try to set it up again.

And then there was Sarah's friend (guy) from ballet.
After he dropped dance, we all sort-of kept in touch.
The mom had been someone I talked with  for years in passing at ballet.
We also used to go to the movies, in a group.
All of both families, hanging out.
But then the kids went to his school dance.
It was proposed — by the mom — as very much just friends, for the fun of it.
Explicitly not a real date, but just so her kid could go to this cool event.
(He'd just started at a new, small school, and didn't really know anyone yet.)
But then the mom started getting him to send cards, and chocolate (to a dancer?), and teddy bears.
No. I'm not imagining this — she talked about taking him to the store and helping him decide what to get.
Then she started going on about how they're "like an old married couple,"
Which freaks out Sarah completely.

By now I am sensing a pattern.
So when my sister starts talking up her husband's nephew, I'm proactive with the no thanks.
(And she was *starting out* with the idea that they should eventually get married, to keep her husband's family money in the family.)
Or she could set things up with her friend's son.
And then there was my other friend's nephew.
Requiring fancy footwork to avoid visiting her when her sister and son plan to.
Which my friend keeps trying to set up.

My take is, this is Completely Weird.

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5 responses to this post.

  1. Oh for crying out loud.Some of my friends and I always joked about how neat it would be if any of our kids actually "got together" and we could all be inlaws together. Well, it has never worked out. Our kids are all awesome young adults and they all have very independent and intelligent minds and while they all respect and like each other, none of the children of any of my friends have ever "gotten together". Kids/young adults will make up their own minds on who they will be with or if they will be with anyone. It's really not something anyone can orchestrate. It was fun to think about for a few months, and that was about all the time it took to realize we should just leave them to their own devices! 🙂

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  2. egads. egadsegads.

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  3. Holy geezu!
    Yeah, it's bad enough when people try to set YOU up…it's easy enough to refuse, but when you get into hurting feelings of friends & their relatives, and of course your OWN child…holy crap, that is a mess. not to mention just. plain. weird.

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  4. I just keep coming back to weird.I've never tried to matchmake with anyone, ever.

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  5. Stay strong lauowolf, and lauowolf's kid. "reasonable, sane" women know nothing of true love. Dancers do. Take the parrot to the movies next time. Polly want some popcorn. 🙂

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