And, btw, the weirdest thing happened – warning, tmi to follow

Over Christmas I had my teen-aged niece visiting, and my daughter home from college.
Coincidentally, they were both having their periods.
Poor dears.
Now, me, I am past all that, for more than two years.
And – if you were wondering – it is lovely not to have that hassle going on, especially since my periods involved migraines and bloating and mood swings and cramping, all on top of just the general annoyance of it all.

So come New Years….
I put on serious weight, just over a few days.
I just couldn't get warm, and my bras all were just fitting all wrong.
Then I just about bit off Tom's poor head for no reason in particular.
And, woops!
Here we go again.

Well, if you are 58 and suddenly start bleeding again, the first thought isn't that it's your long-lost period coming round again.
Kaiser really, really wanted me to come in about it.
So, lucky me, I got to go have an endometrial biopsy – NOT a recommended entertainment, btw.
(And why are there nerves in there to notice sharp objects?
I mean, in the state of nature, nothing scoopy is supposed to be going in there, so what are these nerves for?
And, definitely, there are nerves involved.)

To add to the fun, they told me I'd get the results in the mail in ten days to two weeks.
And it just continued not to arrive.
And at twenty days I come home to a phone message to call the doctor.
Which took 24 hours to turn into a call back.
Turns out, he just wanted to talk it through instead of sending the results in the mail.
Everything is fine, just weird.
I blame the girls – and so does my doctor.

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15 responses to this post.

  1. tooo many hormones.I got one of those 24 hr. waits on a follow-up mammogram. Didn't appreciate that. They should say "it's okay, please call for more info."


  2. My mum got her old period-migraines whenever I had my period around her… made me feel terribly guilty, but there was a very CLEAR connection. That is one of the things I find quite mysterious and fascinating… the synchronization of periods among co-habiting women… how does that work? who's body odors decide when everybody else should bleed? is it all hardwired in with pheromones or does knowledge of periods happening around affect it?Anyways, glad it was all fine.


  3. Having worked for two years now in all-female workplaces, I can attest to the pull-power of the menstrual cycle.


  4. You made this very entertaining to read. And being a woman in her mid-late 40s, I am interested, cause the next 10 years will be testy ones for me, I am sure. Wow, yeah, hormones in the air. We swear our parrot (who is a male) gets very grumpy and aggressive when I get PMS. Every single month. Hormones. Pheromones. I am so glad you are okay, I am sure that was nerve rattling. So much can go wrong down there without even trying.


  5. My best friend just got a very different result from her recent endometrial biopsy (a hysterectomy should make everything fine), so it's really good to hear yours was okay.


  6. Sorry to hear about this! My Gram started bleeding about age 70! We took her in and while there was nothing "wrong-wrong," they did a D&C and she was fine but they really tested the hell out of her!Best wishes!


  7. Glad things are ok, lauo. Your hormones wanted to feel part of that again, if only for a little while. "Remember the old days??? Ahhh…"


  8. Oh well thank god, I thought you were going to say that you had fibroids or something. Anyway, that's amazing!!


  9. Glad everything is okay….that must have been scary. If the biopsy wasn't torturous enough, the waiting really must have been.


  10. oooof, glad to hear that there was nothing wrong after all!


  11. The really interesting part was experiencing what had been my usual monthly hell with no awareness, no warning.YE GODS that was gruesome!Yes, it would be really, really nice if the callback message had said there was nothing dire going on.24 hours straight of Not Being Worried was really difficult.On the other hand, it was a lesson in how convincing I can be: I had explained to Tom how this was clearly Nothing Serious, and he had no idea I was scared stiff.


  12. lol, wow. I’m glad it was nothing serious! Very weird for sure though


  13. Sorry to hear about your friend.Not a fun thing to go through, but one of the better outcomes.Actually, when I was in taking my MA orals, my mother was off getting a hysterectomy.Which was for other reasons, but afterward they discovered a malignancy as well.Which was one of the things I was very, very busy not thinking about.The whole LALALALA thing takes much more energy and concentration than you might suppose.


  14. Thank goodness it was nothing serious. I think it was just your hormones goofing on you.
    I haven't been blessed with my period since 12/20/09; now something's starting again…menopause is hanging over me like Damocles' sword.


  15. It's really not cool that they made you wait like that. But I'm glad to hear nothing is wrong.


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